4th Eldest Daughter Retreat March 26-29 at the Findhorn Foundation, Scotland

We have had to cancel and postpone, but we’re now planning the 4th iteration of the retreat for firstborn women only. The previous ones have had rave reviews of women who felt instant kinship. So come and join us for three days in which we will be led through a process of discovery and recognition, release and liberation by the fabulous Gill Emslie, PhD (eldest of four). The days will have group sessions as well as time for self, friendship, walks and talks. We will also learn how to pamper ourselves with beauty products offered to us by Weleda.


You will find more information and the registration form here

Lucy McCarraher & Lisette Schuitemaker about The Eldest Daughter Effect

Two Eldest Daughters, author Lisette Schuiemaker and publisher and author Lucy McCarraher, discuss the findings of Lisette’s research into and book on Eldest Daughters, and how their position in their family of origin shapes their lives and personalities.

Watch the episode here

First guest on Subtle Moments podcast by Anna Florido

I was delighted to be the first guest on the Subtle Moments podcast of Anna Florido. One of her lovely questions was about ’the energy packages’ that in her experience II put into my books. I had never thought of my writing in those terms. That’s the hallmark of a good interviewer – that they let the interviewee see their life and work in a new light. But then, Anna is a a renowned intuitive healer, speaker and energy therapist. Enjoy this episode that she called ‘Patterns of Life’.

Listen to the podcast here

Wolrdwide survey

The Inner Life of Money

What is your relationship with money? How does it affect you and how do you affect the world through the use of it? That’s the topic of my next book. I will co-author ‘The Inner Life of Money’ with former banker and conscious capital forerunner Marilou van Golstein Brouwers. As part of our research, we have developed a questionnaire which will give us (anonymous!) information on how people with some money to spare think, feel and act.
We would greatly appreciate it if you would help us gather information by filling out The Inner Life of Money Survey. 

Please find the link to The Inner Life of Money Survey here.

Childfree through the Decades with the Childfree Girls

Several times during the conversation hosted by Childfree Girls all of us were deeply moved. For this episode, they brought together seven women without children from a teenager to a sexagenarian – me! We opened up about our life and expectations for the future, discussed bingos, shared thoughts about growing old and many other topics!

You can also listen to this show in podcast format. Search for Childfree Girls on iTunes, Podbean, Spotify, Stitcher, Google Play …

Watch the episode here

My Story at Anotherhood, A space for women without children

The story of Anotherhood begins with Kadi in Los Angeles and Laura in a small village in the Scottish countryside. In 2017 an e-mail connected them through a mutual contact, and a friendship started to grow. Together they found a shared language, spoke the truth that they hadn’t spoken before, about their lives as women in our mid 30’s without children. Finding no answer to the question: Where is the space for women who don’t have children?, they created this. I was happy to be in conversation with Laura who wrote this rendition of our tender exchange.

Read my story here

Discussing Childless Living with Nancy Wiegman on Nancy's Bookshelf

Nancy Wiegman is an expert book reader and interviewer. Since 2007, she has had a weekly radio show on North State Public Radio (NSPR) in which she conducts conversations with writers. I was delighted to appear on her show in March 2019 when we had a lovely exchange on the many aspects of the life of people without children.

Listen to the radio show

Articles on

Here’s a good way to get an impression of my book Childless Living. Below are links to three articles that appeared on the online magazine that publishes articles by well-known and lesser-known authors.

The Dilemma of The Freedom to Choose

What Makes You a Mature Adult

A Life Worth Living … Without Regrets

Turning Negative Self-Talk Around with Sister Jenna on America Meditating Radio Show

Sister Jenna is a spiritual leader, author, radio host and TV personality. Her mission is to offer a perspective for folks to find clarity, power, and insight. She is the recipient of numerous awards like the President’s Lifetime National Community Service Award, Every Day Hero Award by the Foundation for Better Life and the Friendship Archway Awards, to name a few. Her syndicated radio show, America Meditating is a popular global online show on which I appeared in 2019. A propos of The Childhood Conclusions Fix we spoke of inding ways to get over our stories by asking the right questions – and in the process freeing ourselves to live our true gifts.

Listen to the radio show

Podcast Childless Living

I loved my conversation with April Hannah of Path11 about the many aspects of childless and childfree living. We spoke of millennials worldwide who are aware of the choice they have in the matter of parenting, of how we ourselves came to not have children and what the challenges are when we age. I think this makes for a good hour of listening if you’re interested in this life-defining topic.

Listen the podcast here

German edition of The Childhood Conclusions Fix

I am delighted to announce that April 2019 saw the publication of the German version of the Childhood Conclusions Fix in an excellent translation by Claudia Callies. The book is named 5 Schritte zum Frieden mit dem Inneren Kind Negative Glaubenssätze erkennen und loslassen or 5 Steps to Peace with the Inner Child – acknowledging and letting go of negative beliefs.

The book was published by Irisiana Verlag

Korean edition of The Eldest Daughter Effect

“I know this book gave lots of consolation to many first Korean daughters, including me,” wrote a Korean reader after the book had come out in her language. She was surprised at how much she had recognised of the examples we gave in the book seeing as they come from an individualistic culture. This feat points to the conclusion that the effect of our place in the birth order is even more universal than we had thought while writing the book.

We’re enjoying the beauty of the Korean language: 첫째 딸로 태어나고 자란 이들에게는 뭔가 특별한 점이 있습니다. 그 특별함은 주로 책임감, 리더십, 세심함 등으로 드러나곤 하죠. 어린 시절엔 동생을 잘 보고 나이가 들어서는 부모를 살뜰하게 보살피는 큰딸들, 학교나 직장에서 좋은 평가를 받는 장녀들은 우리 주위에서도 쉽게 볼 수 있습니다.

물론 첫째 딸에게도 많은 고충이 있습니다. 지나친 의무감과 책임감, 완벽주의적 성향 등이 첫째 딸을 괴롭히기도 합니다. 그래서 이 책은 이러한 고충들로부터 자유로워지고 싶은 맏딸들에게 날카로운 자기 분석의 길잡이가 되어줍니다. 특별한 공감과 치유의 기회를 함께 선사하면서요. 첫째 딸로 태어나고 싶지는 않았지만 묵묵히 맏이 역할을 해온 이들, 비록 선택하지는 않았지만 첫째 딸로 태어나길 잘했다고 느끼며 살아가는 믿음직한 장녀들 모두에게 두 저자들은 유쾌하고 속 깊은 멘토가 되어줄 것입니다.

[출처] 첫째 딸로 태어나고 싶지는 않았지만》 출간 소식!|작성자 갈매니저

Italian edition of The Childhood Conclusions Fix

I am delighted to announce that the Italian edition of The Childhood Conclusions Fix will be published in January 2019. They gave it the title L’ho creduto sin da bambino Le cinque convinzioni limitanti che ci portiamo dietro dall’infanzia or I believed this as a child – the five limiting beliefs we carry with us since our childhood

Thank you, all at Editizioni Amrita for this wonderful edition.

Conversation with Linda Mackenzie

On August 7, Lisette joined Linda Mackenzie for a conversation on The Eldest Daughter Effect. Yes, the host of this weekly fun, informative and entertaining program navigating natural health and spirit is a firstborn woman, too. Linda agreed that it was time we as eldest daughters had a book written about us. In the lively conversation we touched on the dynamics between parents and the 1st born, the big 5 characteristics of eldest daughters and our need to be perfect, how we like work with a purpose and hints on what works best for us in love.

The Childhood Conclusions Fix reviewed in Kindred Spirit

Turning Negative Self-Talk Around

“Our most negative self-talk hides our most precious gifts,” says Lisette Schuitemaker, author of The Childhood Conclusions Fix. In this easy read she provides insight into how we can turn persistent restrictive self-talk around so we can shine in the gifts that lie on the other side of it.

TEDx Talk

Using world leaders as examples, in this engaging and funny TEDx Talk Lisette Schuitemaker shares powerful insights into how our place in the birth order forms and shapes us – and how we can avoid the birth order blind spot. Her talk ends with 3 tips on how to navigate family gatherings and have a great time with our siblings.

Family & Relationships Finalist

The Eldest Daughter Effect has been named a Family & Relationships finalist in Foreword Reviews’ 2016 #ForewordINDIES Book of the Year Awards. In a competition with over 1500 other entrants, it’s pretty great to have made it this far. Fingers crossed for the winner announcements at the end of June.

Emotions Matter Podcast

Entrepreneurs, Scientists and Experts share their thoughts on emotions, life, work, society and well-being on Emotions Matter Podcast. In this episode Lisette Schuitemaker talks about How your role in the Family affects your personal an professional life. Read the whole item here.

The Telegraph interview

Am I more successful because I’m the eldest child?

Dr Ana Nuevo-Chiquero, from the University of Edinburgh team that led the study, said: “As the household gets bigger, [parents’] time has to be split with younger children, so they miss out on the advantage of being an only child for a time. “It doesn’t mean firstborns get more love – that stays the same.

Radio interview - Breakfast with Erica

After having worked in radio, Erica Longdon became a healer working with angels and sound. She has written a lovely novel ‘In pursuit of perfect timing’ and now does radio shows on spiritual and personal development on 12Listen. She still has the amazing voice, and the interesting questions! I sat on the virtual breakfast table with her, coming in at about minute 21.

Listen to the engaging radio conversation with Erica from minute 21!

© 2017 Lisette Schuitemaker. All Rights Reserved.